Monday, August 15, 2011

Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

I keep reading long books with lots of information that are slow and I have to force myself to read them, but I always end up learning so much in the end and I'm glad that I did. My latest read is Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. It was mentioned a lot in the book "Fascinating Womanhood", which I posted about HERE. Kate recommended it to me also.

All I can say, is it helped me a lot. I know that I'm still a little tiny baby newlywed with lots to learn still, and I haven't gone through all the hard stuff that comes along with marriage. But I'd rather read it now and try to apply it instead of waiting til it's too late.

I enjoyed this book because it looks into both genders, instead of just what women should do like in Fascinating Womanhood. It's written by a man, and he isn't blaming women for everything. Of course I didn't feel like everything he talked about applied to our relationship, but there was a lot of stuff that helped me, like how I need to leave Bear alone sometimes to be himself (men are like rubber bands) and that I'm not crazy for having my ups and downs, needing to talk about everything and just have a venting session every once in a while (women are like waves). It helped Bear to know that when I'm venting, I'm not blaming him, and that I feel much better when I just talk.

The other good thing was learning to ask Bear directly. "Would you take out the trash?" vs. "The kitchen stinks." Men and women each have their silly things, but like the author states at the end:

"Next time you are frustrated with the opposite sex, remember men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Even if you don't remember anything else from this book, remembering that we are supposed to be different will help you to be more loving. By gradually releasing your judgments and blame and persistently asking for what you want, you can create the loving relationships you want, need, and deserve."

I'm grateful I had a good marriage example from my parents and both sets of grandparents. Same with Bear's parents. I'm excited for all the fun years ahead. I am very in love.

*Life Update*
I'm supposed to give a sacrament meeting talk based on Elder Scott's talk, "The Eternal Blessings of Marriage" next Sunday, which will be out last in California. Secretly, I feel like a preschooler lecturing to college students how to do their physics homework. So I'm quite a bit nervous.

Also, I though I had appendicitis earlier this week, because I had pain on my right side. Bear's had his taken out and had a traumatic experience, and was really worried. We finally decided to go to the doctor, who didn't help us at all. The next step was the ER because we needed a CT scan to figure out whatever it was. We're trying to figure out our medical insurance mess, and the pain was dull, not sharp, so we decided to wait it out, I got a blessing that the pain would go away, and it did. I'm fine now. I think it was an ovarian cyst. The doctor did give me a pelvic exam though and said everything looked fine. So I'm back to normal after the scare.

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