Grandpa

My grandpa died today.

Even though I've known for months, I'm still in shock. I've never had somebody close to me die before. He was so young. And I know that he was the best man that he could be and is sealed in the temple. And I know he's not in pain anymore. And I know he's with his dad now. And I know it's the Savior's birthday. But I'm going through the grieving process right now.

I had to take a free day at work and I could barely make it back up to my room because my throat was closing off and I couldn't see through the tears. Now I just feel blah and I don't want to do anything. I want to be with my family right now.

I'm happy because I felt like I needed to write him a letter recently and I did. It was good timing - it barely made it in time.

I found this post I wrote about my grandpa back in 2007:

http://lexichan.blogspot.com/2007/03/dr-limburg-my-granpa.html

I'm so glad I got to spend so much time with him at Christmas. And I don't think I would've wanted to see him suffering and fading away at the end. But I just want to give him a hug right now. I didn't spend a lot of my life with him because we've always lived so far away, but he has really motivated me to do well in school and I look to him as an example of service.

I'm grateful for temples right now and I know that he'd be proud of what I'm about to do. He never got to meet Bear in person :( But my mom said he'll still be at the wedding with me. I'm grateful for eternal families. I just want the pain to go away.