Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Life is Beautiful

So life is beautiful but crazy. But mostly beautiful. It's always hard for me to get into the swing of things. I tend to get overwhelmed and have melt-downs...which broke one of my resolutions. So I decided the smart thing to do is not set a goal to completely stop them, but to figure out why I melt down first and go from there. I expect too much out of myself and compare myself with other people to no end. I get into the same cycle over and over again. I push myself too far. 

Which is when I need to step back and see how beautiful life really is. 2-3 days out of my week might be crazy busy, money might be tight right now, I may not love our living situation, I might be drowning in homework, and I might miss my family, BUT I still have 4-5 days of peace, I'm lucky to have a job, a hard-working husband, have the opportunity to go to an expensive school for free, I do have a place to live and we aren't starving on the streets, and I have a family alive and well that loves me. I have good friends that keep me happy. 

Even though my phone broke this week, a new one came in the mail the next day, even though ice skating was too full in Roanoke we were able to go to Chik-fil-a etc etc. I for one don't believe in chanting "I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy" and forcing positive thoughts or a smile while still being bitter on the inside. Sometimes we need to be sad and let it out. But I think it helps to step back subjectively and say "hey, most of the troubles in my life are in my head" and start being happy from there. 

I'm learning so much this semester because all of my classes are ones that I'm really interested in. Right now we're deciding if we want to do internships or go work in California again this summer, but I'm not going to stress about it. And I'm going to start taking more pictures. I promise.

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