Tuesday, January 14, 2014

The Real Adult Life

Bear started his training in DeKalb on Monday. He left Sunday afternoon and will be back late Friday night. He says the training is intense because they squished 6 days worth of stuff into 5 days. Bear is literally busy all day and we get to talk late at night when he's finally back to the hotel. Man, there are perks to having a post-college, full-time adult job, but there are cons too. I can't imagine how lonely I would be without my parents and siblings right now. Okay, enough with the whining!

One of the great things about living in Nauvoo is the temple is RIGHT there. It was really hard to go to the temple in Virginia (especially with little kids). With the temple being 3.5 hours away, we either had to leave Lachlan with somebody ALL day, or bring a babysitter with us - which was hard to do on Ward/Stake temple day when everyone else wants to go to the Temple too. Now I just need to make sure I don't take it for granted.

I admit, it has been hard for me to get used to being a stay-at-home mom. I'm not dying to go back to school by any means, and I'm actually still pretty burnt out. When people ask me how I did it, I honestly don't know. I'm not a super woman. All I know is that I finished in the nick of time too - I seriously would have had to drop out with the twins. And although I hated having two very time-consuming things that needed my attention - motherhood and school (and they both always seemed to need attention at the same time), now I feel a little useless. I know how important motherhood is, and I'm glad I can give all of my attention to Lachlan now. And I know I need to stay home for all three kids soon. But I can't help but feel like half of my identity (a student) was taken away. Now, I'm just a mom. Real adult life starts now. After my family leaves for Korea, I won't have much socializing or adult conversation. The whole time that I've been married, I've been a student. First, I was a student. Then a student and wife. Then a student and mother. Now, just a mother. I have to keep readjusting my identity every year or so. So I know I'll get used to it eventually, but with non-stop school since I was a little girl, this is going to take some time to adjust to.

I DID NOT like the latest Downton Abbey episode. I know it wasn't graphic, and Julian Fellowes has his excuses "“The whole point of the way we do things on Downton is we don’t do them gratuitously. We are interested in exploring the resultant emotions and the effect these things have on people.” But at what point is he going to stop? He has to keep taking it up a notch. What point is too much?

The weather has warmed up in Nauvoo and our kitty survived. I'm kick-starting my Mary Kay business again and trying to reorganize everything.

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